Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize