I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I enjoy the company of your penis
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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