If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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