i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
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