Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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