My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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