So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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