I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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