the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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