Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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