i barfeds in our rink
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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