I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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