i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I seem to have left my pride at pride
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
