shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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