Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
it's like iHOP with fire
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
