the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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