4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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