Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize