I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize