Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
