Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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