He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
