I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize