What a fucking waste of an outfit
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
