She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
