mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
