Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
