Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
wow bdsm is so cute
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
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