There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
