lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Four minutes until I can fart!
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I wish there were birth control emojis
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
