see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
