So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
