so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
