You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
