on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
