I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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