i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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