And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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