You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
