i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
