"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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