There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize