she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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