STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Randomize
