when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
