Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
