The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
