People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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