I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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