i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
