turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
