Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
